I know i hurt the people around me........they don't know where they stand with me...i know i have mastered the EVIL NASTY element in me to the extreme. Sorry does not always correct my mistakes.......i just hope that all who care would understand that i cant control how i feel and how i express it.
My sorry's are Sincere........thou it does not often looks like it.
So many issues to sort out and don't know where to start. Trying to take one day at a time, blocking out all that is negative in my life.
One thing i have learned is that when bad luck follows u ..........its hard to escape the grip it holds on u.
Trying to think positive thoughts is always not easy, when i'm a realist. I constantly are looking for the bad before i see the good............plans never work out...always expecting the worst. I am the master of overthinking.
How do i change my mind set.......how do i switch of something when i don't know where the switch is.
Is it because im turning 30 that i'm feeling so depressed....... because i feel like half a woman.......or because i know there is missing something in my life and i cant just fix it.
So many unanswered questions....so many doubts.
Y me Y do these things have to happen to me?
Am i being punished for something i did?
I'm i not worthy of being happy?
Am i expecting to much out of life?
Does the fairy tale ending really exist?
Does true love exist?
How do i close a book on a dream and live the life that was planned for me thou its not what i wanted.
Sometimes i wonder is it all worth this much pain.........
Time to try and live and not go so much into the dark place in my mind that is pulling me down over and over again.
I want to be happy......
How do i close a book on a dream and live the life that was planned for me thou its not what i wanted.
Sometimes i wonder is it all worth this much pain.........
Time to try and live and not go so much into the dark place in my mind that is pulling me down over and over again.
I want to be happy......
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